#26: Sesame Soba and Slowing Down

by Skimming

Another beautiful, lazy Sunday.  And this is my dinner.  Lettuce and radish from my CSA, cucumbers from Costco, eggs from Stop and Shop, and noodles from H-Mart.  Topped with a homemade sesame dressing.  Yum!  But I had  late snack of pita chips and hummus so I didn’t finish my meal.  Anyways, it was an enjoyable meal.

Thought of the day: I rush through things.  Or rather, I do things fast.  Those two aren’t always the same, but sometimes in doing things fast, I realize I’m rushing.

  • I eat fast.  And I mean fast.  I barely breathe while I’m eating.  I’m always the first to finish when eating with friends.  And at the end of any meal, I ALWAYS think, “Wow, I should eat slower.  I don’t think I even tasted what I was eating!”  Literally, every time I eat I think that.
  • I work fast.  This means typing, emailing, writing down things, making agendas and plans, thinking, discussing.  Everything associated with working– it’s done fast.
  • I walk fast.  I’m always ahead of a group when I’m walking with others.  I just can’t help it.
  • I shop fast.  I go into a store (grocery, mall, anything) with a mission, a shopping list, and I just shop until I’m done.  I don’t like to browse, roam the aisles, look for other things to buy.  I. Am. On. A. Mission.  Don’t stop me.
  • I relax fast.  When I get a few hours to relax, I read, surf the web, and generally bounce around from thing to thing because I get distracted.  It’s hard for me to sit for hours and just sit.  But when I do get to do it, it’s great.

There are many reasons that I do this:

  • trying to be efficient and not waste time on “unnecessary things;”
  • wanting to get to whatever’s next (although that’s an unending endeavor because there’s always something next);
  • wanting to get something over with (both good and bad things);
  • thinking about something else so I don’t focus on the task at hand and just go through the motions quickly;
  • feeling pressured that I have to do things one after another or else things will fall apart.

But I want to focus on taking more time to do things.  I think there would be benefits to my own mental health and physical and spiritual well being.

  • I could stop and smell the roses.  Yes, cliche, but so true.  The times that I do stop and take time, I see the beauty in the mundane, like anthills!  I just need to consciously tell myself, “OK, walk slower.  Look around.  Drink in the world around you! Enjoy the food!”
  • I would be less stressed.
  • I would feel less like everything depends on me.  (This is, after all, a totally self-imposed idea that I need to let go of.  The world does NOT revolve around me!)
  • I would remember more of the little things.  I have eaten in some good restaurants but because I eat so fast, I don’t often remember my meals.  Maybe slowing down would help me remember those things.
  • I could have more time to reflect and be in the present moment.

I know this isn’t easy for me. I’ve been living this way at least for the last 10-15, even longer, years.  Life just got faster and faster when I went to college.  And then once technology became ubiquitous in our lives and I started working, it just zoomed at an exponential rate.

I’ve got to slow down.

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